its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize