I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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