So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize