So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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