she looked like the bat from fern gully.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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