She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
