Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
