he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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