The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
