I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
