my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
