Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize