You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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