Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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