I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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