Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
