My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
