I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
