Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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