Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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