i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
