the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
