You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
