drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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