I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
