I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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