I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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