my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
