I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
