"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
