you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
