is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize