i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
