The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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