Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
