My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
