My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I am spending my child support on dildos
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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