He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
