we're blogging at a bar
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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