I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
