You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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