I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
