what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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