You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
The uberlube is also flammable
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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