Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
