"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
