is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
