Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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