found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
