okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
