She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
